When no thanks isn’t enough

One of the biggest problems for women looking for dates on the Internet is saying no thanks. I was talking with one of our members at SexyAds.com today who said she’d narrowed down her list of potential keepers to 3. She thought about it and analyzed her feelings and decided she didn’t feel any sexual attraction to one of the men. So far, so good, right? She’d had enough responses to narrow down to three and then found 2 she wanted to check out further.

She told the man that she liked him as a friend but couldn’t see any relationship because she was not sexually attracted to him at all. Instead of thanking her for her honesty and moving on, which is what you’d do, right? No no, here’s what he did.

He wrote back and asked what he’d done wrong. She told him he’d done nothing wrong at all, it had nothing to do with him but it was her lack of sexual attraction for him and that was nature. Still, that wasn’t enough.

He wrote back and this time began belittling her for not realizing what a catch he was. I would have tossed it in the bin but she chose to answer one more time and said she was sorry he was hurt but she had done nothing to hurt him other than to say she wasn’t attracted to him and wished him well in finding someone who would be really attracted to him.

Did he move on?

No, of course he didn’t. He wrote again and this time was abusive and mean.

That’s where I come in because she asks me what to do and should she leave the website because she feels bad that she’s hurt this poor guy. Poor guy? It drives me nuts. Men say they are angry that women won’t answer every email and then when they do they get shit like this to deal with.

If you’re a guy and you’re looking for love online. Please, please be grateful that someone says no thanks and move on to better prospects. You’ll get confirmation that the woman was real and that your mail was read and next time maybe change your response a little bit.