Pet peeves
Do you have little toothpaste and split splatters on your bathroom mirror every freakin morning? It’s like a teeny snow shower welcoming me nearly every morning.
In almost every respect, Mr. Flirty is perfect, but there’s this one niggly thing that drives me insane. Have I complained or nagged? No, I sit quietly and bitch to myself (and anyone else who will listen) about it. I figure this man has so few faults, how can I complain about something that only takes me a few moments to wipe off? I am convinced that I have heaps more bad habits than he does.
So how do you handle little issues like this in your relationship? Does the toilet seat position bother you? Does she never empty her ashtray often enough? Does he wait til the garbage is falling on the floor to take it out?
Now that I think about it a bit longer, there IS one more thing that bothers me. I know my man is not alone in this and I have no solution.
Why do so many men wait to be asked to do anything?
“Honey, all you had to do was ask and I’d have done that for you.”
When I hear that I want to smack him.
“Who asked ME to do it?” I snap back.
“Don’t get angry, I was just saying I would have done it if you’d asked.”
I know he would have done it if I’d have asked but why should I have to ask. If the garbage bin is full, you empty it. You don’t need to be asked. If you leave your clothes on the kitchen floor (maybe that’s too much information) then you should know that someone has to pick them up.
On this subject we have had many discussions. His final reply is always the same.
“I might not do things to suit you.”
Uh huh. Taking out the trash is not rocket science. Nor is making a bed or emptying the dishwasher. Buying linen is a different thing - I’ll do that.
Did I say he was perfect and I complain like this? See my dilemma? Here’s a man who works hard, is always respectful, treats me as a complete equal, never tells me what to do, will do anything and go anywhere I want, never says a word about what I spend, AND he’s the sexiest man on the planet — I have no right to complain but maybe he could be perfecter.
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On this subject we have had many discussions. His final reply is always the same.
Another way to view relationships is as an invitation to look into the mirror at yourself. We invite people into our lives based on how we think about ourselves. If we believe deep down that we have “issues” or unresolved feelings, then how we react or interpret the behaviour of a partner reminds us of our inner disharmony.
Of course, each of us chooses to see and experience what we do. Some people falsely believe that finding a partner will make them whole and resolve their inner issues without effort. You may fantasize that having a partner will eliminate the discomfort of feeling alone. Real growth and lasting relationships come when you realize conflict is about your own disconnectedness from your true self. You may think its unrealistic to assume people will read your mind. Then again, how they respond to you is their way of doing just that. Its always an invitation to learn something useful and grow.
You know what my pet peeve is when My husband uses the toothpaste and does not put the top back on.