Studies tell us that when we meet a person of the opposite sex (or the same sex if that’s your game) online we build a virtual intimacy not unlike dating in person. There is a reason so many men and women engage in cybersex when they’re on the net. It’s not because they only want to explore their sexuality – they do it because it works for them. They can get sexually aroused by talking sexy with another person.

The worry then is when two people who’ve been doing the virtual rumpy pumpy finally meet in person. It’s a first date but these two people have discussed their sexuality for hours and hours. They feel a sense of emotional ownership of a relationship that may or may not exist for the other person. They meet, they kiss and off they go to experience sex in a physical sense.

Why do I say worry? When you’re having sex with one partner exclusively as in marriage or long term partnering, most people don’t worry about safe sex. I know people should but trust has come in and the need to be safe doesn’t seem so important. What then for someone who has had net sex for months and is “sure” that the other person is being honest about no sex with anyone else? They have unprotected sex, that’s what they do.

According to the U.S. Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, more than 50% of women use a condom when having sex with a partner for the first time. I would guess that it drops to much less than 50% for those women who’ve had a virtual intimate relationship. Ladies, be safe. Always us a condom when having sex with someone new. It just doesn’t make sense to do otherwise.

Is your social life stuck? Too many people today are so busy with their job and their family and their commitments that they don’t spend much time at all being social. Some people are shy at first and find making friends uncomfortable or difficult. All of us who are in the slim social life group should make a pact that THIS YEAR is going to be the year that we break out of the rut we’re in. Here are a few tried and tested tips for making changes you can be proud of in your life.

Spend some time soul searching about what things you really enjoy doing. We all do things because our friends enjoy them or our family enjoys them but in this instance, let’s focus on what WE enjoy doing. Make the list as long as you want. Maybe you want to meet people in the swinger lifestyle or meet people who enjoy cooking and dinner parties or people who like to play chess or anything you can think of. There are people out there who’d welcome a new friend. Few people have too many friends.

Even if you’re shy, making friends is easy. You make friends by repeated exposure to one another. Check out an online chatroom or forum and you’ll see what I mean. People are friends because they chat back and forth nearly every day. That’s how friends are made on and off-line. If you go to a swingers club every weekend, you are bound to make new friends. If you play chess every Wednesday, you’re bound to make friends. It takes getting off your butt and doing something about it. We ARE in control of our lives if we want to be.

Still got your list of things you like to do? Join a dating site or social networking site and find someone to share these interests with! If you love seeing foreign films, write that in your profile or ad and find someone else who enjoys doing that too. Once you have a friend and if it’s a friend of the gender you’re attracted to and you like each other.. nature takes over and does all the work for you.

Every city has a newcomers club or association. It doesn’t matter if you’re not new – go along anyway. You’ll find other people who are looking to expand their circle of friends.

Don’t spend this year doing the same old things the same old way. Create the life you want. It’s more than possible.

Videochat can be a whole lot of fun and people tell us every week how much they enjoyed themselves. Also, we see comments going back and forth where someone is saying how much fun they had last night. A check or two of the cams and some people are always G-rated and some, well, you’ll just have to see for yourself how sexy they can be on cam.

As the Internet has grown over the past 13 years we’ve been in business, a certain videochat etiquette has emerged — created and developed by the users themselves. There are a couple of things to remember when chatting via videocams with a group of people.

Don’t be a leghumper.

I don’t like to be sexist but we don’t have any problems with women going on and on asking a man to take off his clothes or show this bit or that bit. Why?  Because most women don’t ask.  They assume men come from the factory with all the mod cons.

The women who cam have been mentioning how annoying it is when men try to play director. These women are real people and they aren’t working in chat for a living. They’re on cam to enjoy themselves because they love feeling sexy and this is one outlet for sexual expression. Don’t ruin it for everyone by playing director and causing the women to stop videochatting.

No means no.

We’ve had a couple of people write to us at SexyAds.com because this woman or that woman wouldn’t let them view their cam. Tough. That’s how life is. If life were perfect we’d all be millionaires and drive around in fancy cars. How do you get to watch their cams? Be friendly. That makes you appear trustworthy. Begging is never attractive and it really pisses off the rest of the people in the chatroom when someone goes on and on and on begging to view a cam.

A Scotsman walking down the street sees a woman with absolutely perfect breasts.

He approaches her and says, “Miss, would ye let me bite ye breasts for $100?”

“Are you nuts?!!!” she replies, and keeps walking.

He turns around, runs around the block and gets to the corner before she does.

“Would ye let me bite ye breasts for $1,000 dollars?” he asks.

“Listen, I’m not that kind of woman! Got it?”

So the Scotsman runs around the next block and faces her again.

“Would ye let me bite ye breasts just once for $10,000 dollars?”

She thinks about it for a moment and says, “Hmmm, $10,000 dollars; O.K., just once, but not here. Let’s go to that alley over there.”

So they go into the alley, where she takes off her blouse to reveal the most perfect breasts in the world.

As soon as he sees them, he grabs them and starts caressing them, fondling them slowly, kissing them, licking them, burying his face in them, but not biting them…

The woman finally gets annoyed and asks, “Well? Are you gonna bite them or not?”

“Nah”, says the Scotsman…. “Costs too much…”

How can you tell whether someone is replying to you because they think you’re hot looking and they are really interested in getting to know you or if they are just being polite?

Does the writer ask any questions of you or do they only answer the ones you have asked but gives no room for follow-up questions? If you write again and it takes quite a while to get a reply, they’re just being polite and you should move on to someone who’s more interested in you.

If you receive an email from another member, it’s great to give a reply to everyone even if they’re not for you. They’ve taken the time to compose an email to you, so let them know you read it. Being polite is good but I’d prefer someone who is polite and says thanks for writing but I don’t think we’re a match. Then I can move on and contact others.

Remember, if you get an email and it doesn’t feel right in your gut, don’t get involved. I am a firm believer that our gut reaction is always right, even when our head says they’re drop dead gorgeous and our heart goes pitty pat. You want the best person for you, not an ornament or someone who’s a right pain in the ass.