Have you decided to kiss dating goodbye? Said “Sayonara” to finding someone special in your life because it’s just all too hard? Whatever might have pushed you to stop looking is obviously unique to you but nothing is better than having someone to cuddle up to at night If you haven’t tried adult dating online, then maybe this is the avenue for you to find real success.

No Shyness

There’s no worry about shyness at the first meeting because once you’ve established a rapport with someone through email or chat, meeting them in person is just like meeting an old friend for a drink. You’ll know so much about this person from your previous conversations that you’ll be comfortable.

How Does It Work?

It’s really quite easy and most of the larger sites work pretty much the same way. You join, usually at no cost, by filling in a short profile of yourself. How old are you, what nationality, body shape, location, interests and what sort of person you’re seeking. You’ll be offered the opportunity to add a photo or gallery of photos to your dating profile and I heartily recommend you do that. With so many people on the net, why choose one with no photo when there are 100 with no surprises?

Then use all the features that the site offers to get your name (let’s call this branding) out there. You want to be seen as a real person and real people join in and post in the forum or join the online chat or video chat or they post blog entries or they comment on other people’s profiles, photos, blogs, etc. This is the quickest way to get profile views. Once you do that, you’re halfway there.

How Do You Choose?

Sure there are heaps of dating sites out there and it can be quite confusing as to which one would be best for you. There are locality based sites and religion based sites and activity based sites and on and on. When we started our adult dating site at SexyAds.com we chose that niche because we felt that there was an opportunity for us with people like us. These would be people who had been around before and were really missing out on passion and intimacy in their relationship. We felt that every relationship is based upon sexuality, regardless how many people say it’s not. It’s always about that and many other things. If you’re feeling flirty, try us out.

Free or Pay?

There’s something to be said for both. If you really can’t afford to contribute to a site and don’t mind wading through lots of advertisements and spam, then you’ll do just fine at a totally free site. We have a combination of both. You can do lots for free but there are additional perks for those who support the site. Our members tell us every day that they like not having tons of advertising on every page and not get heaps of messages from people promoting porn sites.

So if you have pulled the plug on dating, I think it’s time you put it back! Online adult dating is one of the best ways to meet. I met my husband through a personal ad on the net in 1994 – that’s nearly 15 years ago – before the WWW was even in Orlando. We met through an ad on a newsgroup feed on a local bulletin board system. How times have changed.

In everyone’s life, there will come a time where he or she has absolutely nothing to do – no dating partner or close friends to go out with. Ever heard the phrases “being so boring that you can’t get a decent date” or “I will be growing old alone forever”. If you’ve ever heard these lines or even said them yourself, it’s time to take action. If you believe you’re undatable, then you are but I don’t think so. I think there’s someone special for everyone on the planet. That’s how life goes on. Believe that and you’re on your way!

You’ll hear stories about online dating being full of creepy people and in some cases that’s true but these are the same people who live in your town. You don’t go out with them and you don’t need to choose the creepy people either. I met my husband through an online ad and my daughter met her husband through an online ad. I did it back in 1994 just as the www was getting recognized as a real force in the world.

When we first started SexyAds.com we were excited when we saw the first web address on a billboard at the Atlanta airport. I said to my husband, “the Internet is going to take over the world, just wait and see.” We started one of the first dating sites on the net and here we are twelve years later and we’re still going strong. Sure things have changed, people’s use of the Internet has changed but people still care for each other in the same old way. Just the introduction is different.

Online Dating is a great way to widen your circle of friends. When I told my grown children that i found a man in Australia and I wanted to go to meet him they thought I was nuts. “He’ll be an axe murderer for sure!” my daughter said. We’d emailed, we’d talked on the phone, we’d exchanged photos and I just knew I didn’t want to die not knowing if this man could have been perfect for me. So I got on that plane and here we are, 15 years later and still madly in love. Sure we had all the common problems that communicating through a flat screen can cause, PLUS we were on the slowest dial-up connection which I must admit was the fastest available at the time. We tried live voice chat and all we got out of it was, “can you hear me?” and “nah, you’re breaking up.” Imagine how easy it is today with dating sites left and right and not only live audio chat but audio and video as well.

If you’ve been listening to those who diss online dating, it might be that they joined one once a long time ago and nobody but jerks looked at their profile and that colored their experience. You can’t join a dating site and do nothing but list a user name. No photo, no written ad, no contacting others, no blogs, no online chat or video chat, no forum posts.. how will anyone find you? Join a site and put everything you’ve got into making it the best profile you can and then stand out from the crowd. Leave those “waiting around for someone to find them” behind and make the first move. Send a comment to them or a tickle or leave a note on their blog, make a comment on a forum post that someone left, check out the chatrooms. I promise you, if it could work for a little old lady like me who found true love half a globe away, it can happen to you. Good luck!

When we were kids, we were read stories of princes who rode away to lands far, far away to look for their princesses. They battled dragons and monsters. They fought ogres and witches. They did all this and more in their quest for their one true love. Despite the sufferings and hardships they encountered along the way, they were able to save their damsels in distress and find their heart’s one true desire. Sadly, these things only happen in fairytales but do we let real life and cynicism get in the way of our quest for our heart’s missing piece.

Too often we listen to the news or the chatter at work and it’s about blood, sweat and tears. We’re bombarded with the negative things that are happening around us. We are blinded and jaded by thoughts that have marred our optimism. It doesn’t have to be that way. We can choose how we react to the world around us.

We all long for someone to love and care for us and too often we’re too focused on the bad things around us to pay attention to the good things that happen every day to us and make us more worthy of loving.

The magic and power of love often comes in the most unexpected places and times. Believe in love. Keep your heart and mind open for it. Look for the good in people rather than always seeing their faults. Your life will be better for it in every aspect. And… start living the fairytale — maybe that prince or princess will show up before you know it.


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A long, long time ago, way before any of us were born, the postal service was one of the busiest industries around. Imagine millions of letters passing through the post offices. Many were written by lovers-both young and old! And long before everybody had a phone, people sent letters to people they loved and missed! Now the Internet has changed all that. Not only has the Internet changed the way people communicate with each other but it has also revolutionized the way dating works. Back in the dark ages in 1994 when I met my husband through a news group feed on a local bulletin board system, my friends and family were convinced I was a nutter.

One of the best perks that stemmed out of the Internet is that people from around the world can (and do) meet each other. Whether it’s through instant email or live or cam chat, there’s no waiting days or even weeks for a letter to arrive. We don’t need to meet somebody physically or face to face to make friends with them. I’ve never been in the same room with quite a few “best friends” from around the world. Before my husband and I met, we had quite a few dates online. They felt real and important to both of us.

It’s little wonder that we went on to create a dating site on the web as soon as it became available in Orlando and Melbourne. The Internet paved the way for our relationship and then we enabled heaps more people to meet and date potential mates online! The rise of online dating has not replaced traditional dating but it’s just another method of meeting. People no longer must rely on only meeting people through friends, in bars or in other public places. And we also no longer wait on letters or phone calls to talk to the ones we like. Online dating has become a practical medium to meet people without the hassle of pre date jitters. It offers a lot of options for people to meet.

Meeting someone new in person is fun but for someone shy, there’s the fear of appearing awkward and not able to show how nifty they really are. With online meet-ups, things become easier. When people meet each other for the first time online, the anonymity of the net is like wearing a uniform. It gives you confidence you wouldn’t otherwise have. We become bolder. We get into the “getting to know you” stage much quicker allowing a relationship to move things to the next level. They could either decide to meet each personally, no matter the distance. That’s what happened to us!

I’m constantly amazed by how the Internet has changed people’s lives. I remember driving into the Atlanta airport one day and seeing the airport’s web address on a billboard. It was the biggest “aha” moment for us because we knew if something as big as the Atlanta airport – the largest airport in the world – was embracing this thing called the Internet, it was going to take off like nothing we’d ever encountered. So we’ve gone from me being the nutter in Georgia going to meet this geek she met through a local bulletin board system to nearly every person in the world connected. I just visited Atlanta last week. I saw people connecting to the net in airports everywhere. Laptops, Blackberries, iPhones – whatever – they were connected.


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Eric Ivy contacted me today to let me know that his new site, The Dating Matrix, is now live. He spends all his time helping people to make the best connections for themselves.

He’s got a book called The Dating Matrix which is a 28 day program for changing your life from lonely to fantastic. Remember the old saying.. “Nothing works unless you do” and that phrase is certainly true where finding a life partner is concerned. You can’t just sit around and wait for Santa to bring you a lover all wrapped up in tissue paper.

I hear from both men and women all the time who tell me that they try and try and just can’t seem to make a good connection. Either nobody replies to their ads or email or they seem choose one wrong person after another until they give up.

Well, for those of you in that situation, this book will help. I’ve been in the dating business for over 10 years and frankly, some people aren’t too good at it but everyone can learn. The Dating Matrix will break it all down into little bits that you can do to change your life. Imagine yourself a month from now with someone who just melts when you look into their eyes. It can happen but you’ll have to take the first step. Just a tiny step but one that you’ll always be grateful that you did.