I received an email question today from a woman who has recently begun a relationship with someone she met on SexyAds.com. Here’s her edited email, and I’ve changed the nickname for her privacy:

When I met Sharky I thought all my Christmases came at once. He’s tall, dark and handsome, comes from a wealthy family and he’s got a great job as a partner in a law firm AND he lives less than 20 minutes from me. Who knew I’d get that lucky online.

We’ve been dating for a couple of months now and I’m head over heels for him and when we’re together I think he feels the same way. When we’re not together I have a huge case of jealousy and it’s not attractive.

Sharky has lots of women clients and more importantly a lot of single female friends. He likes to go out to lunch, golf and tennis with them and I keep thinking to myself, “He’s perfect and I want him so all you others stay away!” That’s not practical so I need some of your sage advice.

Ok, first of all, Sharky’s not a young man and he’s been single for quite a while according to his profile. If he had no single female friends, wouldn’t you wonder what he did with himself before he met you? It’s perfectly normal for him to have female friends and yes, he’s probably slept with some of them. Everyone’s got a past. He’s CHOSEN you and that is what should be important to you.

Do you have male friends? If you’re like me, you probably do. Is he jealous of the time you spend with them? I suspect not. He knows you’re a complete person on your own who had a life before he entered it.

Down the road, if there are occasions that are important to you that he be with you and he chooses to be with another woman, then you can get the fangs out. Don’t run around like a witchy hag wanting to know what he’s doing every moment. If you have that much time on your hands, get a hobby or volunteer some time to a homeless shelter, retirement home or hospice. You won’t have time to be jealous then.

You might find that you are constantly suspicious and jealous and if that happens you should consider whether it’s a good idea for you to pursue this relationship. Life is all about being happy, so don’t put yourself in a position where you’re often not happy.

I’m very happy you’ve found someone special and if you handle yourself right, he’ll fall right into your arms whenever you want him. Fuck up and you’re restarting your search, I’m afraid.

Tennis star Maria Sharapova recently said that any future husband may have to fight for her affections with her dog. It seems that her potential husband won’t be alone.

A British survey has revealed the extraordinary lengths people will go to for their pets.

Almost one third of the respondents said they would sell valuable personal possessions to pay a large vet bill, and about 11 per cent would even re-mortgage their house.

But, it’s the women’s devotion to their four legged companions that stands out.

When asked who they would insure first, almost two thirds more women than men said they would choose their pet over their other half.

It seems a woman will stand by her dog, rather than man.

So men, make pals with the dog because that’s the jury you have to convince!

It’s Valentine’s Day and you don’t have a date. Normally not having a date doesn’t bother you very much. Today, seeing all your friends, workmates and others sharing their love publically by exchanging gifts, candy, sexy undies or flowers makes you think twice. Ok, it’s the sexy undies that make you think twice.

Later you find yourself at the bar or pub drinking a few more than you’d planned on, hoping to find someone who’s also experiencing a drought in the dating department. Be careful when trolling for dates while you’re drinking.

The Beer Goggles Effect

In a study conducted by researchers at England’s Manchester University in 2005, scientists studied the extent of the “beer goggle” effect on a given individual in a given situation. They found that alcohol is not really the only factor affecting the drunken perception of beauty. Other factors, according to their research, include:

* How well lit the area is
* The quality of your eyesight
* The amount of smoke in the air
* The distance between you and the target

For instance.. The woman on the left is the real woman. She’s not overly attractive and honestly, after a few beers, she’s still going to be less attractive than the women on the right.

So be careful out there. Valentine’s Day is only one day of the year. Get past it. The beer goggles effect is real and you don’t want to have to saw your arm off in the morning.

You’ve got plenty of time to find someone special who’ll spoil you rotten and will have wild and crazy sex with you.

Not getting lucky often enough? Leave a comment and I’ll do my best to give you some advice.

At least I thought I was born in the year of the rat. I saw an Asian astrologer on CNN earlier today that said people who are born in the year of the rat are going to have a great romantic year in 2008 and I was thinkin… yeah.. cool. My daughter-in-law is Chinese and I was on skype wishing her a happy new year and I was bragging about my love luck in 2008 because I was born in the year of the rat.

She congratulated me and then said, “Mom, are you sure you’re a rat? I am not 100% certain but I think you’re a pig.”

GASP!!!!

Me? A Pig? I’ve lived 60 years under the impression that I’m a rat and I learn that I’m a pig? What’s up about that? Look up any birth chart in any Chinese restaurant in the US and I’m a rat. How much more exact do you need than that?

Wellsir, rats go to January 28th and I’m a 29th woman. THAT makes me a pig.

So, feeling all dejected I decided to look up Chinese astrology and see what my sign is going to provide in the way of luck now that I know I’m a pig. I was getting really excited about my man being all romantic and loving and getting big presents. But then I saw my Chinese horoscope.

It’s not love I’m going to get but money !!! So should I be more excited about money than I was about love? I shouldn’t be but I have to admit that I instantly started thinking.. new boat. new boat. new boat.

If you see me tootling along in the Bay of Islands in New Zealand in a boat anytime soon, just tell your friends, “It was all pig luck.”

I received this in my email this morning. Normally I don’t read a lot of the crap some friends send me but I did read this one. I’m a 41.

Below is Dr. Phil’s test. Dr. Phil said he scored 55 and then he gave the test to Oprah and she got a 38.

This is a real test given by man human relations departments at many major corporations. It helps them get better insight concerning their prospective employees Some people pay a lot of money to find this stuff out.

I have no idea why the answers are scored the way they are. Someone with a wackier brain than I have sorted it out. I would like to read the rationale behind why one answer is a 6 and another is a 1.

Answers are for who you are now — not who you were in the past. As you answer the questions, jot the question number and the letter answer on a piece of paper. Saves scrolling.

Leave your score in the comments.

1. When do you feel your best?

a) in the morning
B) during the afternoon and early evening
C) late at night

2. You usually walk…

a) fairly fast, with long steps
B) fairly fast, with little steps
C) less fast head up, looking the world in the face
D) less fast, head down
E) very slowly

3. When talking to people you. .

a) stand with your arms folded
B) have your hands clasped
C) have one or both your hands on your hips
D) touch or push the person to whom you are talking
E) play with your ear, touch your chin, or smooth your hair

4. When relaxing, you sit with.

a) your knees bent with your legs neatly side by side
B) your legs crossed
C) your legs stretched out or straight
D) one leg curled under you

5. When something really amuses you, you react with…

a) big appreciated laugh
B) a laugh, but not a loud one
C) a quiet chuckle
D) a sheepish smile

6. When you go to a party or social gathering you…

a) make a loud entrance so everyone notices you
B) make a quiet entrance, looking around for someone you know
C) make the quietest entrance, trying to stay unnoticed

7. You’re working very hard, concentrating hard, and you’re interrupted..

a) welcome the break
B) feel extremely irritated
C) vary between these two extremes

8. Which of the following colors do you like most?

a) Red or orange
B) black
C) yellow or light blue
D) green
E) dark blue or purple
F) white
G) brown or gray

9. When you are in bed at night, in those last few moments before going to sleep you are…

a) stretched out on your back
B) stretched out face down on your stomach
C) on your side, slightly curled
D) with your head on one arm
E) with your head under the covers

10. You often dream that you are…

a) falling
B) fighting or struggling
C) searching for something or somebody
D) flying or floating
E) you usually have dreamless sleep
F) your dreams are always pleasant

And now for the scoring…

POINTS:

1. (a) 2 (b) 4 (c) 6
2. (a) 6 (b) 4 (c )7 (d) 2 (e) 1
3. (a) 4 (b) 2 (c) 5 (d) 7 (e) 6
4. (a) 4 (b) 6 (c) 2 (d) 1
5. (a) 6 (b) 4 (c) 3 (d) 5 (e) 2
6. (a) 6 (b) 4 (c) 2
7. (a) 6 (b) 2 (c) 4
8. (a) 6 (b) 7 (c) 5 (d) 4 (e) 3 (f) 2 (g) 1
9. (a) 7 (b) 6 (c) 4 (d) 2 (e) 1
10. (a) 4 (b) 2 (c) 3 (d) 5 ; (e) 6 (f) 1

Now add up your total number of points.

OVER 60 POINTS : Others see you as someone they should ‘handle with care.’ You’re seen as vain, self-centered, and who is extremely dominant. Others may admire you, wishing they could be more like you, but don’t always trust you, hesitating to become too deeply involved with you.

51 TO 60 POINTS : Others see you as an exciting, highly volatile, rather impulsive personality; a natural leader, who’s quick to make decisions, though not always the right ones. They see you as bold and adventuresome, someone who will try anything once; someone who takes chances and enjoys an adventure. They enjoy being in your company because of the excitement you radiate.

41 TO 50 POINTS : Others see you as fresh, lively, charming, amusing, practical, and always interesting; someone who’s constantly in the center of attention, but sufficiently well balanced not to let it go to their head. They also see you as kind, considerate, and understanding; someone who’ll always cheer them up and help them out.

31 TO 40 POINTS : Others see you as sensible, cautious, careful & practical. They see you as clever, gifted, or talented, but modest. Not a person who makes friends too quickly or easily, but someone who’s extremely loyal to friends you do make and who expect the same loyalty in return. Those who really get to know you realize it takes a lot to shake your trust in your friends, but equally that it takes you a long time to get over if that trust is ever broken.

21 TO 30 POINTS : Your friends see you as painstaking and fussy. They see you as very cautious, ext remely careful, a slow and steady plodder. It would really surprise them if you ever did something impulsively or on the spur of the moment, expecting you to examine everything carefully from every angle and then, usually decide against it. They think this reaction is caused partly by your careful nature..

UNDER 21 POINTS : People think you are shy, nervous, and indecisive, someone who needs looking after, who always wants someone else to make the decisions & who doesn’t want to get involved with anyone or anything! They see you as a worrier who always sees problems that don’t exist. Some people think you’ re boring. Only those who know you well know that you aren’t.